How To Get Over A Traumatic Breakup

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Relationships go through many challenges that sometimes result in traumatic breakups hence knowing how to get over a breakup ahead of time can be quite helpful to you. Many might laugh this off and wonder the benefits they stand to gain from knowing how to get over a breakup.

Well, knowing how to get over a breakup not only teaches you how to recover from a breakup, but it also helps you to understand the power of silence after a breakup, helps you to know what to do after a breakup, how to deal with a breakup, how to move on from a breakup and helps you discover how to get over a breakup fast.

These several benefits of knowing how to get over a breakup will now be discussed in detail so you can have a good grasp of what you stand to gain.

 

Power Of Silence After A Breakup

Silence is a very powerful tool to engage after a breakup because it allows you to fully take in all that has happened to you and to begin your healing process.

 

How To Deal With A Breakup

Breakups happen around us all the time, so much so that we sometimes chose not to talk about them, but we should, if we want to deal with the realities of the experience. Here are some ways you can deal with a breakup.

 

1.  Let Out Your Emotions

Breakups can be quite emotionally exhausting, that is why if you are going through one, you need to let out your emotions and not try to bottle them up. Cry if need be, scream if it makes you feel better, just do not let those emotions eat you up, you have to release them.

 

2.  Accept Your Feelings

Another way to deal with a breakup is, to be honest about what you are going through and not pretend everything is OK when it is not. This is because being realistic with yourself will help you to grieve and move on. But in a situation where you decide to try to conceal your feelings and act like everything is fine, you will keep your emotions locked up inside you and this will definitely not be helpful if you want to heal.

 

3.  Find Yourself

It is OK to grieve over a breakup, but don’t let yourself get lost in that grief. Let out your emotions and get yourself back on track. Get busy with your own business, smile, be happy, it is in doing this that you get to get over the pains of the breakup.

 

3.  Stay Connected To Loved Ones

The love and support we get from our friends and family during tough times in our lives helps us to heal faster and gives us the strength to move on.

 

What To Do After A Breakup

There are specific things we need to do to get over traumatic breakups. They are:

1.  Respond To The Trauma

This is the first and most important thing to do after a breakup. People respond differently to pain, it is however best to respond in a way that is not going to be hurtful to you or anyone.

 

2.  Reflect

After responding to the trauma the next thing you should do is reflect on your past relationship to know the things you did right or possibly did wrong and also to see some of the red flags that you were not able to notice when you were neck-deep in the relationship. The essence of this is for you to be able to learn from the relationship and move on.

 

3.  Talk To A Friend Or Counselor

After reflecting, if you still feel a sense of heaviness in your heart, then you should talk to someone close to you or a counselor who can listen to you and advise you appropriately on what to do.

 

4.  Make Meaningful Adjustments

As a follow up to the above points, you can now start making necessary adjustments in your life that will make you a better and more effective person. Please bear in mind that making necessary adjustments doesn’t mean you have a problem, it simply means you are open to improving on yourself. In fact, sometimes the thing you just might need to do at this stage is to forgive your ex or even yourself if need be and move on.

 

5.  Socialize

Having expended so much energy on emotional issues, this is the time you get to relax and have fun with your friends and family. I laid emphasis on this in one of my blog posts titled 10 Ways To Find Happiness In Every Situation.

 

How To Move On After A Breakup

Moving on after a breakup might not be as easy as it sounds for some, but it helps to know that whatever the case is, your relationship is in the past (the one that resulted in a breakup) and you have your future ahead of you, so you should seize the moment to make the best of your future. Here are a few tips that have proved to be helpful to me in times when I needed to move on from a breakup.

 

1.  Subject Yourself To Self-scrutiny

Have a comparative reminisce of your self-identity and your past relationship. Note the disparities. The identification of the disparities will speak to your hurting being. You will then have an understanding of the wrong steps you had taken and then, self-forgiveness sets in.
This will also give you a blueprint on what to look out for on your part by the time you venture into any other relationship.

 

2.  Voice Out

There is a part of the human nature which seeks solace, succor…. That wanting to speak and lay bare one’s heart. It is natural. We all seek shoulders to lean on at crucial parts of our lives. That is why this period is a good time to vent your emotions out to someone you trust.

 

3.  Pick Up Your Pieces And Move On

Life goes on….
Pick up your pieces and begin to step into your self-definition which you have recalled during the comparative reminisce as stated above.

 

4.  Let It Go

Set yourself free absolutely by forgiving either yourself or your ex. If you don’t, you will hinder your healing process. So let go and build who you want to be without hindrances.

 

5.  Set Goals For Yourself

To move on from a breakup, getting your mind off it helps. So now is a very good time to set achievable goals for yourself and make solid plans for your life.

 

6.  Self-indulge Yourself

Have fun, recreate yourself, go out, make friends, travel, do exercise… Just illuminate your spirit.

 

7.  Surround Yourself With Family Members That Are Not Toxic To Your Being

The assurance and love that family members radiate always resonate with the inner tranquility in an individual. They also serve to check your excesses, helping you to maintain a balance.

 

How To Get Over A Breakup Fast

Most people will want to get over their breakup and move on as fast as possible because of the emotional trauma breakup brings. If you need to get over a breakup really fast, here are a few tips you can use.

 

1.  Avoid Idleness

If you desire to get over a breakup fast, you have to look for ways to keep your mind engaged, so you don’t start thinking about your past relationship again.

 

2.  Make New Friends

Making new friends is a good way of getting your mind to drift off the pain of the breakup and to get it to enjoy the comfort of a new company.

 

3.  Give Yourself A Treat

Now is a good time to indulge in doing things that make you happy. You can decide to go on a vacation, go shopping, visit a nice restaurant or even do the simplest of things like indulging in your hobbies.

 

Breakups are not fun experiences but painful ones, that is why when you are getting over a breakup, quotes like these can be really helpful.

“Not friends, not enemies, just strangers with some memories.” — Frank Ocean

“I’m going to smile and make you think I’m happy, I’m going to laugh, so you don’t see me cry, I’m going to let you go in style, and even if it kills me – I’m going to smile.” — Lone Star

“The most authentic thing about us is our capacity to create, to overcome, to endure, to transform, to love, and to be greater than our suffering.” — Ben Okri

“Nobody will protect you from your suffering. You can’t cry it away or eat it away or starve it away or walk it away or punch it away or even therapy it away. It’s just there, and you have to survive it. You have to endure it. You have to live through it and love it and move on and be better for it and run as far as you can in the direction of your best and happiest dreams across the bridge that was built by your own desire to heal.” ― Cheryl Strayed

“Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Tiptoe if you must, but take the step.” ― Naeem Callaway

 

 For you

Thanks for staying with me to the end of this post, I hope you found it really insightful and helpful in your desire to get over the trauma of a breakup.

 

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