52 Things Your Partner Should Never Say To You
What are the things your partner should never say to you?
Discover the phrases that can damage your relationship and leave lasting emotional scars. In this article, we explore the things your partner should never say to you and provide tips on how to communicate effectively and respectfully.
Strengthen your relationship and build a deeper connection with your loved one by avoiding hurtful language and understanding the power of your words. Without further ado, let’s begin!
52 Things your partner should never say to you!
Communication is an essential aspect of any healthy relationship, and we must learn to communicate effectively with our partners. However, sometimes the words we use can have a long-term impact on our loved ones.
Certain phrases can cut deep, causing lasting pain and resentment and damaging our relationships. This is why it is crucial to understand the things your partner should never say to you.
These phrases can range from insults and accusations to dismissive comments and outright cruelty. The reality is that even in the heat of an argument, it is possible to communicate your feelings without using hurtful language.
In this article, we will be exploring some of the most damaging things your partner should never say to you. By avoiding these phrases, you can help build a stronger, healthier relationship based on open and respectful communication.
While it can be challenging to steer clear of hurtful language during emotional conversations, it is always worth the effort.
We’ll discuss the effects these phrases can have on your emotional well-being and your relationship, as well as provide tips on how to approach these conversations constructively and respectfully.
Remember, words can hurt, but they can also heal. By understanding the things your partner should never say to you, you can take the first step in building a relationship that is based on love, trust, and mutual respect.
So, let’s dive in and explore the phrases and words that can damage your relationship and learn how to communicate in a way that fosters growth and connection!
Comparing you to someone else
Comparing your partner to someone else can hurt and damage your relationship. It can make your partner feel insecure, inadequate, and unloved. Examples of things your partner should never say to you:
1. “Why can’t you be more like [using the name of a friend or family member]? They always remember to do things without me having to remind them.”
This type of comparison suggests that you are not good enough and that someone else is better. It can make you feel like you are constantly being judged and evaluated by others.
2. “I wish you were more like my ex. He/she was always so caring and thoughtful.”
This comparison is not only hurtful but also disrespectful to you as their current partner. It can make you feel like you are competing with their ex and that you can never measure up to their expectations.
In general, couples need to avoid making comparisons against others. Instead, they must focus on the positive qualities and strengths that you bring to the relationship.
If they have concerns or criticisms, they should express them in a constructive and non-comparative way.
Bringing up past mistakes or wrongdoings
Bringing up past mistakes or wrongdoings can make you feel like you are constantly being judged and criticized. Furthermore, it can prevent you both from moving forward and building a stronger relationship.
Verbal examples of mean things to say to your boyfriend:
3. “Remember that time you lied to me about where you were? I can’t trust you anymore.”
Bringing up past lies or betrayals can be exceedingly hurtful to your partner. It can make you feel like they haven’t forgiven you, even if you have apologized and taken steps to make amends.
4. “You always do this. You’re so selfish and inconsiderate.”
5. “I can’t believe you did that. It was so stupid and thoughtless.”
Such statements can make you feel like you can never do anything right, and they’d constantly hold your past mistakes against you.
Partners should avoid bringing up past mistakes or wrongdoings as a way to attack or criticize their partners. Instead, they can put their issues forward, saying, “I feel hurt when you do this. Can we talk about how we can make things better?”
Or you can use deep love messages to make them happy!
Threatening to end the relationship as a way to get what they want!
Scaring you by talking about ending the relationship just to get what they want can be toxic and manipulative behavior. It can erode the trust and respect in your relationship, making you feel insecure and powerless.
Examples of things you don’t say to your wife:
6. “If you don’t do what I want, I’ll find someone else who will.”
7. “If you don’t agree with me, then we’re obviously not meant to be together.”
8. “I can’t be with someone who doesn’t give me everything I want.”
Threatening to end the relationship as a way to get you to comply with their wishes can be very damaging. It can make you feel like you are being used or manipulated, destroying the foundation of trust and respect in your relationship.
Using the threat of ending the relationship to pressure you into agreeing with them can be a sign of a controlling and abusive dynamic. It can make you feel like you must sacrifice your beliefs and values to maintain the relationship.
Instead, couples should communicate openly and honestly about their needs and desires. Then, work together to find solutions that meet both of your needs.
Belittling your accomplishments or aspirations
When someone dismisses your accomplishments or belittles your successes, it can make you feel like your hard work and dedication are not appreciated.
9. For example, if you tell your partner that you finally finished writing a book, and they respond with, “Oh, that’s nice. But have you ever considered writing something that people will actually want to read?”
This response belittles your accomplishment and devalues your effort and hard work. More examples include:
10. Suppose you tell your partner you’re starting a business, and they say, “Ha! Good luck with that. You’re not cut out for entrepreneurship!”
11. “Well, you’re not really that great of an actor, are you?”
Such responses minimize your talents and abilities and make you feel like you shouldn’t even bother trying.
Belittling your accomplishments or aspirations can be very damaging to your self-esteem. It can prevent you from achieving your full potential. It’s essential to support and encourage your loved ones and celebrate their successes, no matter how big or small.
Accusing you of cheating or being unfaithful without evidence.
Getting accused of cheating or being unfaithful without evidence can be a form of emotional abuse that disturbs trust and damages a relationship. Some things your partner should never say to you:
12. “I know you’re cheating on me, but you’re too good at covering it up.”
13. “I just have this feeling that you’re not being faithful to me.”
Being accused of cheating without any evidence can make you feel like you are being unjustly attacked and unfairly punished. This kind of accusation can also put pressure on you to constantly defend yourself and prove your innocence.
14. “I checked your phone and saw some texts that made me think you’re cheating on me.”
Invading someone’s privacy and snooping through their personal belongings is a violation of their trust and can cause significant damage to the relationship.
Accusing someone of cheating based on flimsy or non-existent evidence can make them feel like their privacy and autonomy are not respected. If you have infidelity concerns, communicating openly and honestly with your partner is essential.
Making disrespectful or derogatory comments about your family or friends!
Making rude comments about your family or friends can create tension, conflict, and hurt feelings in the relationship. It can also make it challenging to maintain healthy and positive relationships with the people you care about.
Here are things your partner should never say to you:
15. “I can’t believe you’re still friends with her. She’s so annoying and immature.”
16. “I don’t understand how you can spend time with your friends. They’re all so boring and lame.”
These comments are explicit insults toward your friends and can make you feel like your life decisions and feelings don’t matter. It can also create a sense of tension and discomfort when your partner is around your friends.
Criticizing your hobbies or interests
Criticizing someone’s hobbies or interests can be a sensitive topic, as these activities are often a source of enjoyment and personal fulfillment!
Couples should be mindful of how they approach any criticism and consider the impact their words may have on each others’ feelings and sense of self. What are some things your partner should never say to you?
17. “Why do you waste your time on that? It’s such a useless hobby.”
18. “You’re worse than a gully cricketer at handling that bat. Maybe you should try something else.”
19. “Playing snooker is a childish interest. You should grow up and find something more mature.”
20. “I would never be caught doing something like that. Your hobbies are so uncool.”
These types of comments can be hurtful and dismissive. They may discourage the other person from pursuing their hobbies or interests.
It’s vital to remember that everyone has different passions and pursuits. What might seem pointless or dull to one person could be incredibly fulfilling and engaging to another.
Be mindful of how you talk about and engage with other people’s hobbies and interests. By showing respect and appreciation for each other’s individual pursuits, we can create a more positive and inclusive community.
You can also compliment your partner to promote growth in life!
Dismissing or minimizing your feelings
Minimizing someone’s feelings can be a harmful and invalidating experience. It can make the person feel unheard and unsupported and may lead to further emotional distress.
Here are some verbal examples of dismissive comments:
21. “I don’t see why you’re getting so heated about this. It’s not like it’s a life-or-death situation. You need to calm down and stop overreacting.”
22. “I don’t understand why you’re feeling that way. It doesn’t make sense to me. You need to be more logical and think things through.”
These comments not only minimize your feelings but also imply that your emotional response is inappropriate or excessive.
23. “You’re too sensitive. You need to toughen up and stop taking everything so personally. It’s just a joke, don’t be so dramatic.”
This comment can make you feel like your emotions are a weakness or flaw. It can create a sense of shame for feeling a certain way and may discourage you from expressing your emotions in the future.
It’s essential to show empathy and validation when someone is experiencing difficult emotions. Also, couples should avoid making comments that could make their partner feel like their emotions are not valid or important.
Refusing to apologize or accept responsibility for their actions!
When we make mistakes or hurt someone’s feelings, we must take responsibility for our actions and sincerely apologize. However, sometimes people may refuse to apologize or accept responsibility for their behavior, which can be frustrating and hurtful.
This can take many forms, including denying that they did anything wrong, deflecting blame onto someone else, or refusing to acknowledge the harm that they caused.
Some unapologetic things your partner should never say to you:
24. “I would have done things differently if you had just communicated better with me. It’s not my fault you didn’t clarify your expectations.”
25. “It’s not my responsibility to make you happy. You need to learn to take care of your own emotions and stop blaming me for everything.”
26. “I’m sorry if you were offended, but I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. It’s not my fault that you took it the wrong way.”
These types of responses can be frustrating and hurtful, as they deflect responsibility and minimize the harm that was caused. They can also create a sense of invalidation and disconnection between the parties involved.
When we refuse to apologize or accept responsibility for our actions, it can erode trust and damage relationships.
Recognizing when we have made a mistake or hurt someone is important. Then, take steps to make things right, whether that involves offering a sincere apology or taking steps to change our behavior in the future.
Making insensitive or inappropriate jokes at your expense!
Jokes that belittle or demean you, make light of your struggles or difficulties, or poke fun at your identity or experiences can create a sense of invalidation and exclusion.
While humor can be a powerful tool for bringing people together and fostering connection, it can also be used in harmful and destructive ways. Here are some inappropriate things your partner should never say to you:
27. Imagine you are in a group setting, and someone jokes about your appearance or personality. For example, “Your nose looks so big; maybe we are breathless because you inhaled all the oxygen!
The person being joked about may feel embarrassed, humiliated, or singled out, and may not feel comfortable speaking up or addressing the issue.
This type of behavior can create a toxic environment where people feel afraid or hesitant to be themselves and may even lead to bullying or harassment.
28. Another example could be joking about a sensitive topic, such as mental health, sexual orientation, or race.
Then following it with things like, “I didn’t know it was such a big deal. You need to learn to take a joke,” or “It’s not my fault that you’re so easily offended. You need to toughen up.”
Even if the person making the joke does not intend to cause harm, it can still be hurtful and offensive to those who are affected by these issues. It can also perpetuate harmful stereotypes and reinforce negative attitudes and beliefs.
These types of responses not only dismiss the harm caused by the joke but also imply that the person being joked about is at fault for not being able to take a joke.
By being aware of our own biases and taking steps to be more sensitive to the experiences and perspectives of others, we can create a more positive and supportive environment for everyone.
Ignoring or dismissing your boundaries
Boundaries are the limits we set for ourselves to protect our physical, emotional, and mental well-being.
When someone ignores or dismisses these boundaries, it can create a sense of discomfort, violation, and powerlessness. It can also be a way of exerting control over someone else.
Here are a few examples of dismissive comments:
29. Imagine that you have set a boundary of not wanting to discuss sexual events. However, your partner continues to force you into talking about it even after you’ve expressed your disinterest.
This behavior can make you feel ignored and can create a sense of mistrust in the relationship. More verbal examples include:
30. “I know you said you don’t like it when I do that, but I like it, so I’m going to keep doing it.”
31. “You’re being irrational. Why can’t you just get over it?”
Remember, healthy relationships are built on mutual respect and trust, and ignoring your boundaries is a major breach of both.
Using insults or name-calling during disagreements
When a partner resorts to name-calling, it shows that they are unable or unwilling to communicate their feelings respectfully and constructively.
It can also be a sign of deeper issues, such as anger management problems or a lack of empathy. For example, if you’re having an argument with your partner and they start calling you names like “stupid” or “crazy,” it can be hurtful and make you feel devalued.
Some people worry that “my wife yells at me” or “my husband yells at me.” So what are some insulting things your partner should never say to you?
32. “You’re such a loser. No wonder you can’t hold down a job.”
33. “I can’t believe I have to deal with someone as incompetent as you.”
34. “You’re so stupid; you never get anything right!”
35. “You’re crazy if you think I’m going to put up with this!”
Instead of attacking you personally, your partner should focus on the issue at hand and try to find a solution that works for both of you.
Healthy disagreements are a normal part of any relationship, but they should always be approached with respect and empathy. If your partner starts using insults or name-calling during a disagreement, it’s important to set boundaries and communicate how their behavior is making you feel.
If the behavior persists, it may be a sign that the relationship is unhealthy and that you need to consider seeking outside help or ending it altogether.
Being dishonest or lying to them
Honesty is a cornerstone of any healthy relationship, and when a partner is dishonest or lies to you, it can be a severe breach of trust.
Whether it’s a tiny white lie or a more serious deception, being lied to can leave you feeling hurt, betrayed, and uncertain about the relationship’s future. Here are some examples of dishonest things your partner should never say to you:
36. “I didn’t know you wanted to go to that event. I thought you had other plans.”
37. “I wasn’t texting my ex, it was just a friend from work.”
38. “I didn’t break that vase; it must have been the cat.”
39. “No, I wasn’t cheating on you; I was just out with friends till late. And I was drunk, so I forgot to tell you.”
When a partner lies, it can be a sign of deeper issues, such as a lack of trust, fear of conflict, or an inability to communicate effectively. It’s important to have open and honest communication with your partner and to clarify that lying is unacceptable in your relationship.
Making you feel inferior or inadequate.
In a healthy relationship, both partners should feel valued and respected. However, when a partner consistently makes you feel inferior or inadequate, it can be a form of emotional abuse that can damage your self-esteem and mental health.
Some inferior things your partner should never say to you:
40. “I don’t know why you bother trying to look nice; you’ll never be as pretty as my ex-girlfriend. She was a model, you know. Compared to her, you’re just average.”
41. “You’re really struggling in your career, you know that? Why can’t you be more like [using name]? They’re so successful. You’re just not cut out for this, I guess.”
42. “I don’t know why I even bother trying to explain this to you, you’re not smart enough to understand. You’re just not as quick as I am, I guess.”
There are many ways that a partner can make you feel inferior, such as by criticizing your appearance, belittling your accomplishments, or constantly comparing you to others.
When a partner engages in this type of behavior, it can be a sign of deeper issues, such as insecurity, jealousy, or a desire for control.
Remember, you deserve to be with someone who values and respects you for who you are and who supports your goals and aspirations.
Bringing up your exes or past relationships in a negative way!
Talking about past relationships can be a sensitive topic. When a partner brings up your exes or past relationships in a negative way, it can be hurtful and damaging to your relationship.
Whether it’s comparing you to their ex, criticizing your behavior based on past relationships, or bringing up painful memories, this behavior can disturb trust and create tension in your current relationship.
What are some negative things your partner should never say to you?
43. “I’ve never had to deal with someone so dramatic before; even my ex wasn’t this bad.”
44. “You’re just like my ex, always getting jealous over nothing.”
45. “I know how you ran your ex away with your madness. I hope I don’t get stuck in anything like that.”
Making such comments may be a sign that they are not ready to fully commit to your current relationship. In this case, it may be necessary to have a frank conversation about your future together and what you both want from the relationship.
Making you feel like you need to compete with others for their attention or affection!
Feeling like you constantly need to compete with others for your partner’s attention or affection can be an incredibly stressful and damaging experience.
Whether it’s your partner flirting with other people, prioritizing their friends over you, or constantly comparing you to others, this behavior can create feelings of insecurity, jealousy, and resentment in your relationship.
46. “I don’t understand why you’re upset. I was just being friendly with that sweet person; it doesn’t mean anything.”
47. “I’m sorry, I can’t talk right now. I’m hanging out with my friends and having a good time, unlike when I’m with you.”
Remember, a healthy relationship should be built on trust, respect, mutual love, and commitment. Feeling like you need to compete with others for your partner’s respect and love can erode all of these qualities.
It’s important to address the issue as soon as possible to prevent further damage to the relationship!
Not taking your consent seriously.
Not taking your consent seriously can manifest in many different ways, from pressuring you into sexual activities you’re uncomfortable with to disregarding your feelings about important decisions. This behavior can create feelings of discomfort, violation, and even trauma.
Some non-consensual things your partner should never say to you:
48. “I know you said you don’t want to do this, but come on, just give it a try. You might enjoy it.”
49. “I know you’re not comfortable with this, but I really want to do it. Can’t you just give in for me?”
If you feel like your partner is not taking your consent seriously, it’s crucial to communicate your boundaries clearly and assertively. Let them know what you’re comfortable with and what you’re not, and don’t be afraid to enforce those boundaries if they are crossed.
Remember, you have the right to set boundaries and to say no to anything that makes you uncomfortable. If your partner is not willing to respect your consent, it may be time to reevaluate the relationship and whether it is truly healthy and fulfilling for you.
Making fun of your insecurities and vulnerabilities!
In any relationship, feeling safe and secure with your partner is essential. However, if your partner constantly makes fun of your insecurities or vulnerabilities, it can create feelings of shame, embarrassment, and hurt.
Making fun of your insecurities or vulnerabilities can take many forms, from teasing or mocking you about something you’re self-conscious about to belittling your emotions and feelings. Some verbal examples include:
Here are some jokey things your partner should never say to you :
50. “You’re so weird for being afraid of that. I don’t know how you even function in the real world.”
51. “Why can’t you just be more confident? It’s not like anyone else cares.”
52. “I don’t get why you’re so self-conscious about that. It’s not like it matters.”
This type of behavior can damage your self-esteem and destroy your trust in your partner.
Suppose you feel like your partner is making fun of your insecurities or vulnerabilities. In that case, it’s important to address the issue head-on. Tell them how their behavior makes you feel, and ask them to stop.
If they continue to make fun of you or belittle your feelings, it may be a sign that they are not genuinely invested in your well-being and happiness.
Remember, you deserve to be with someone who respects you and your emotions and who makes you feel safe and valued. If your partner cannot do this, it may be time to reassess the relationship and whether it is truly healthy for you.
The essence of this article is for you to know the things toxic partners say and try to avoid them to keep your relationship healthy. That is why there are well over 10 things your partner should never say to you compiled above.
Healthy relationships are built on open communication, mutual respect, and a willingness to work through challenges together. If you and your partner are committed to these principles, you can create a relationship that is strong, supportive, and fulfilling for both of you.
Remember, you deserve to be with someone who treats you with love, kindness, and respect, and there is no shame in seeking help or support if you need it along the way.
Pin For Later!